If you were a pigeon you could fuck forty times a day. It's something to bear in mind when filling out the form for reincarnation.

The ostrich is the only animal officially endowed with political direction.

In order to see birds it is necessary to become a part of the silence. One has to sit still like a mystic and wait.

I hope you love birds too. It is economical. It saves going to heaven.

If I had to choose, I would rather have birds than airplanes.

I planted some bird seed. A bird came up. Now I don't know what to feed it.

I had started imitating a parrot, which is unusual, in that a parrot is supposed to imitate you. By taking the initiative you allow the parrot no alternative but to be itself, which proves again that attack is often the best defence.

The love bird is one hundred per cent faithful to his mate, who is locked in the same cage.

A Zen master stood up to give a lecture. As he was about to speak, a bird sang sweetly outside. He immediately sat down saying, 'The lecture is over. I have nothing more to add.'

The dodo never had a chance. He seems to have been invented for the sole purpose of becoming extinct and that was all he was good for.