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Funny Quotes
Showing: 1 - 10 Funny Quotes of 18
Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe.
Just going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in your garage makes you a car.
A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on.
The reason I talk to myself is because I'm the only one whose answers I accept.
Once you can accept the universe as matter expanding into nothing that is something, wearing stripes with plaid comes easy.
There's a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line.
My tastes are simple: I am easily satisfied with the best.
Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.
I love mankind, it's people I can't stand.
Never put off until tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.
Relationship Quote
A man keeps another's secret better than he does his own. A woman, on the other hand, keeps her own better than another's.
Wise Quote
A wise girl kisses but doesn't love, listens but doesn't believe, and leaves before she is left.
Relationship Quote
A woman we love rarely satisfies all our needs, and we deceive her with a woman whom we do not love.
Life Quote
The time we waste trying to find out what life is all about could be spent loving someone and finding out.
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