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Funny Quotes

Showing: 1 - 10 Funny Quotes of 18
Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe.
Just going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in your garage makes you a car.
A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on.
The reason I talk to myself is because I'm the only one whose answers I accept.
Once you can accept the universe as matter expanding into nothing that is something, wearing stripes with plaid comes easy.
I love mankind, it's people I can't stand.
There's a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line.
Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.
My tastes are simple: I am easily satisfied with the best.
Never put off until tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.



Happiness Quote
Happiness always looks small while you hold it in your hands, but let it go, and you learn at once how big and precious it is.


Success Quote
Success is liking yourself, liking what you do, and liking how you do it.
Success Quote
I don't know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody.
Inspirational Quote
You cannot wait for inspiration. You have to go after it with a club.

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