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Funny Quotes
Showing: 1 - 10 Funny Quotes of 18
Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe.
Just going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in your garage makes you a car.
A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on.
The reason I talk to myself is because I'm the only one whose answers I accept.
Once you can accept the universe as matter expanding into nothing that is something, wearing stripes with plaid comes easy.
I love mankind, it's people I can't stand.
There's a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line.
Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.
My tastes are simple: I am easily satisfied with the best.
Never put off until tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.
Love Quote
It is not a lack of love, but a lack of friendship that makes unhappy marriages.
Motivational Quote
If you start by promising what you don't even have yet, you'll lose your desire to work towards getting it.
Happiness Quote
There is only one way to happiness and that is to cease worrying about things which are beyond the power of our will.
Inspirational Quote
There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.
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