Funny Quotes :: Page 2

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Ralph Waldo Emerson

Famous American poet, essayist and philosopher.

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Marilyn Monroe

Famous American actress, model and singer.

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Albert Einstein

German-born mathematician and theoretical physicist.

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Funny Quotes

Showing: 11 - 18 Funny Quotes of 18

Always go to other people's funerals, otherwise they won't come to yours.

Yogi Berra

Don't be so humble - you are not that great.

Golda Meir

I came from a real tough neighborhood. Why, every time I shut the window I hurt somebody's fingers.

Rodney Dangerfield

Once I pulled a job, I was so stupid. I picked a guy's pocket on an airplane and made a run for it.

Rodney Dangerfield

I think God, in creating man, somewhat overestimated his ability.

Oscar Wilde

The older I grow, the more I distrust the familiar doctrine that age brings wisdom.

H. L. Mencken

I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by.

Douglas Adams

Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read.

Groucho Marx

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Trust Quote

You believe lies so you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself.

- Marilyn Monroe

Life Quote

Sometimes the questions are complicated and the answers are simple.

- Dr. Seuss

Inspirational Quote

Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever.

- Mahatma Gandhi

Life Quote

My mission in life is not merely to survive, but to thrive; and to do so with some passion, some compassion, some humor, and some style.

- Maya Angelou

Life Quote

You never know what life is like, until you have lived it.

- Marilyn Monroe

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