Funny Quotes :: Page 2

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Ralph Waldo Emerson

Famous American poet, essayist and philosopher.

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Marilyn Monroe

Famous American actress, model and singer.

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Albert Einstein

German-born mathematician and theoretical physicist.

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Funny Quotes

Showing: 11 - 18 Funny Quotes of 18

Always go to other people's funerals, otherwise they won't come to yours.

Yogi Berra

Don't be so humble - you are not that great.

Golda Meir

I came from a real tough neighborhood. Why, every time I shut the window I hurt somebody's fingers.

Rodney Dangerfield

Once I pulled a job, I was so stupid. I picked a guy's pocket on an airplane and made a run for it.

Rodney Dangerfield

I think God, in creating man, somewhat overestimated his ability.

Oscar Wilde

The older I grow, the more I distrust the familiar doctrine that age brings wisdom.

H. L. Mencken

I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by.

Douglas Adams

Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read.

Groucho Marx

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Funny Quote

Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.

- Phyllis Diller

Love Quote

I love you not only for what you have made of yourself, but for what you are making of me.

- Anonymous

Life Quote

You never know what life is like, until you have lived it.

- Marilyn Monroe

Relationship Quote

A relationship is what happens between two people who are waiting for something better to come along.

- Anonymous

Motivational Quote

It's not the load that breaks you down, it's the way you carry it.

- Lou Holtz

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