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Funny Quotes
Showing: 11 - 18 Funny Quotes of 18
Always go to other people's funerals, otherwise they won't come to yours.
Don't be so humble - you are not that great.
I came from a real tough neighborhood. Why, every time I shut the window I hurt somebody's fingers.
Once I pulled a job, I was so stupid. I picked a guy's pocket on an airplane and made a run for it.
I think God, in creating man, somewhat overestimated his ability.
The older I grow, the more I distrust the familiar doctrine that age brings wisdom.
I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by.
Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read.
Love Quote
Few people know what they mean when they say, "I love you." ... Well, what does the word love mean? It means total interest. I think the reason very few people really fall in love with anyone is they're not willing to pay the price. The price is you have to adjust yourself to them.
Friendship Quote
Sometimes you have to get to know someone really well to realize you're really strangers.
Wise Quote
Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect.
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