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W. C. Fields Quotes
Brief author info: W. C. Fields (1880-1946) American comedian and actor.
Showing: 1 - 7 W. C. Fields Quotes of 7
Never try to impress a woman, because if you do she'll expect you to keep up to the standard for the rest of your life.
There may be some things better than sex, and some may be worse. But there is nothing exactly like it.
It's a funny old world-a man's lucky if he gets out of it alive.
It was a woman that drove me to drink and I never got the chance to thank her.
It was a marriage of convenience, as my father had a blister on his big toe and couldn't travel far to find a girl.
It ain't what they call you, it's what you answer to.
Show me a great actor and I'll show you a lousy husband. Show me a great actress, and you've seen the devil.
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Funny Quote
Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.
Funny Quote
Always go to other people's funerals, otherwise they won't come to yours.
Inspirational Quote
There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.
Funny Quote
The reason I talk to myself is because I'm the only one whose answers I accept.
Family Quote
You have to live your life according to what comforts you, not what the rest of your family thinks you ought to be doing.
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