George Carlin Quotes
Showing: 11 - 20 George Carlin Quotes of 21
Can placebos cause side effects? If so, are the side effects real?
Geologists claim that although the world is running out of oil, there is still a 200-hundred-year supply of brake fluid.
Have you noticed when you wear a hat for a long time it feels like it's not there anymore? And then when you take it off it feels like it's still there?
Flowers are one of the few things we buy, bring home, watch die, and we don't ask for our money back.
We are all pre-cancerous.
Some people see things that are and ask, Why? Some people dream of things that never were and ask, Why not? Some people have to go to work and don't have time for all that shit.
Put two things together which have never been put together before, and some schmuck will buy it.
If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?
I am not a complete vegetarian. I eat only animals that have died in their sleep.
We will never be an advanced civilization as long as rain showers can delay the launching of a space rocket.
The man who moves a mountain begins by carrying away small stones.
The road to success is always under construction
Action may not always bring happiness, but there is no happiness without action.
I love you not only for what you have made of yourself, but for what you are making of me.
Just going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in your garage makes you a car.